As gay as

Frankly, I'm quite disappointed by the paucity of these similes. For instance, the "french horn" example. Indeed, numerous entries in this thread seem rather obvious (and I surmise the subtle ones are more mirth-inducing), but these examples feel quite outlandish. Would I jeopardize the thread's continuity if I inquire about their rationale?

None of these were designed to be humorous. I find these gay stereotypes unappealing, and some are frankly offensive. Many in this thread are akin to "Gay as an inconsequential item."

I confess, I'm struggling to grasp the intent behind many of these comparisons. For example, the "french horn" analogy…

Seriously?

Seriously?

Precisely, the initial point.

In a related vein, I've always been drawn to the comparison: 'He's so firmly closeted he's eating Turkish delight with the witch queen of Narnia.'

I once encountered a piece of fan fiction where a woman described a male companion as 'So entrenched in his closet, he was passing me my shoes.'

At times I've used the phrase "gay as a Gucci bag crammed with rainbows." I'm unsure of its origin, but it struck me as amusing. Also, I've heard, likely from my sibling, a description comparing a friend to "more flamboyant than a gay man at Gay Land on 'free entry' day."

I once read a piece of fan fiction where a woman described a male companion as 'So entrenched in his closet, he was passing me my shoes.'

I recall hearing a comparison to "buried so deep in his closet that he's finding Christmas presents."

Naturally, there's an obvious parallel involving Narnia as well.

Gay as AIDS. Presuming it's a South Park or Team America reference, or a similarly frivolous remark.

A poster on these forums (likely Sampiro) described Michelle Bachmann's spouse using the comparison, 'So gay he sneezes glitter.'

Gay as a three dollar bill.

Am I using it correctly?

Sort of. Not precisely. It is perhaps more apt to say, 'Queer as a three-dollar bill.'

More flamboyant than the volleyball scene in Top Gun.

I adapted that comparison from 30 Rock, but it serves as my go-to.

More flamboyant than Richard Simmons running naked through a field of pussywillows.

With Barbra Streisand's "The Way We Were" playing in the background.

Patton Oswalt effectively utilized a comparison…'More flamboyant than eight men engaging nine men.'

…like a tree teeming with chickadees.

Gay as a hee-hank. No, I've never heard that one. I simply appreciate the word's usage.

His moniker isn't Slim, it's Slender.

I posit, that lad is as unconventional as a two-bob watch.

I've always been fond of the classic "queer as a three-dollar bill." My students occasionally employ the analogy "gayer than Glee."

I recall hearing a comparison to "buried so deep in his closet that he's finding Christmas presents."

Naturally, there's an obvious parallel involving Narnia as well.

My mind conjures '…so deeply closeted that he gave Mr. Tumnis a surprising gift.'

I'm uncertain if I heard that somewhere or if it's just quite apparent.

Turkish delight.

My family's favored exaggeration was, 'More exceptional than X McX, the most extraordinary person in the world.' I suspect this is from Blackadder, or possibly an original family quirk.

So, more flamboyant than Gay McGay, I surmise.

He took longer to depart than Michael Jackson at a Cub Scout meeting.

Let's please avoid discussion of pedophiles in threads concerning homosexuality.

A poster on these forums (likely Sampiro) described Michelle Bachmann's spouse using the comparison, 'So gay he sneezes glitter.'

It was, "so gay he farts glitter." I've appropriated that one.